Monday, December 8, 2008

Nectar Of The Gods

Dr. Pepper /[dok-tor pep-er] -beverage of amazingness
1. A quite interesting carbonated soft-drink. It tastes great the first time you have it, or if you don't drink it too frequently, but its' flavor seems to fade and become un-noticeable if you drink it on a regular basis. It is better than Coke and Pepsi, and all the other popular soft-drinks, and often causes one to belch loudly, which is reason enough to drink it.
2. Mr. Pibb's older, more successful cousin.

I wasn't experienced in selecting the best beverage when I was twelve, but thankfully, my Uncle Brian (aka "Stone Cold") came swiftly to me and informed me of my error. I had just recently been dipped in the "caffine" side of the pool of beverages about 2 years previously because in Missouri not everyone carries root beer like they did in Utah, so I either had to convert to the "dark side" or just go for the unattractive sodas like Sprite, which made me sick at the time. Anywho, having the cheap mom that I have, I got Dr. Thunder (the cheap nasty crap version of Dr. Pepper from Walmart) while I was staying in California with my grandparents (along with my mom and brother) for a few weeks. I don't recall the specific details, but my Uncle Stone Cold told me these powerful, vital words of beverage wisdom.

"Dr. Pepper is the nectar of the Gods. Dr. Thunder is the nectar of the Walmart employees."

To this day, I still remember those words. I have tried several knock-off brands of the heavenly nectar (ie: Dr. Thunder, Mr. Pibb, Pibb Extra, and the worst one ever was Dr. Hyvee--gross.) I glady inform all those confused drinkers that they really aren't drinking the best soda out there, that they're being cheated of deliciousness.

Sadly, I am now called obsessed with Dr. Pepper. I think that's just a whee bit extreme.

Obsessed? Of course not.
I don't know who you're talking about.... :)


Natalie said...

"its' flavor seems to fade and become un-noticeable if you drink it on a regular basis" are so right. In fact, I was just noticing that this morning. So, I waited a while, oh like 6 hours, tried again and it was as heavenly as ever!! Dr.Pepper is most certainly the nectar of the gods, and I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!

KC Mom said...

I agree too that the flavor fades...all the soft drinks do. So my cure...wait awhile and it comes back!

Valsy said...

Hey, your cheapwad mother here. I ONLY buy the cheap stuff so that you can appreciate the "nectar" all the more. You know what they say....absence makes the heart grow stronger. :) By the way, why are taking advice from a man whose dog thinks he is "dreamy"?
Love you
This was hilarious

thedeanfamily said...

I am sorry your mom is such a tight-wad. Sadly, she has had such tight-wad issues since she was about 15. I am glad to hear that Uncle Stone Cold has wisdom enough to enlighten you on such profound subjects. He must be amazing.

Kathy said...

I can honestly say that you are incorrect to think that "Dr. Pepper is the nectar of the Gods"! Everyone in this house knows it is Mountain Dew! and I can say from personal experience when I say that the true nectar of the god's never fades in taste and flavor. and yes I admit it I am addicted, but then again there are worse things to be addicted to..... like bad tasting Dr. Pepper. This was a very funny look into your life. Thanks for sharing. and BTW your Mom's tightwaddedness is one of her best qualities. :)